by Kathleen Blease
first posted Feb. 17, 2011
Right now, I think my parents would laugh, and laugh hard, if they were to read this post. Growing up, I was just as difficult about dressing for Mass as any teenager, and that was....er....okay, well... thirty years ago (Yikes!). This issue is tougher to address these days, isn't it? Why is that? Because those teens are now adults (that's us), and we still want to do our own thing. Boy, do I understand!
There are two ladies who completely changed my mind and convinced me that jeans and flip-flops have no place in Sunday worship. First and foremost is my mother. Mom wouldn't give up. When we attended Mass with our parents, all four of us were expected to dress appropriately and pass a basic look-over. Of course, I whined and cried when I couldn't wear my brand new Calvin Kleins. And, yes, I found ways to wear them anyway....like waiting until the very last nano-second to show up in the dining room where Mom was waiting. Sigh. I remember, I remember. (Sorry, Mom.)
The second lady who had a big impact on me entered my life in my adult years, after I was married. My brother's wife, Maria, taught me a thing or two about presenting myself at Mass, in front of Our Precious Christ. Maria grew up in a large family who immigrated from Brazil when she was a child. Her mother insisted that the girls wore dresses always. And they all looked beautiful. They learned to be aware of their appearances as children of God at all times, not just at Mass. Over the years, their example has very much affected me. I have to tell you, the ladies in Maria's family are beautifully, modestly, and simply dressed. They are in no way frumpy or matronly, and they believe in maintaining their appearances without gaudy remedies, such as thick mascara or lipstick.
I have made a one-eighty, from a tempramental teenager to a Mom who is watching over her sons' souls. So I'd like to share with you how I have been able to work myself through the various arguments against dressing appropriately for Mass. And, yes, it does have to do with the soul. I'll cover that briefly below. Here we go...
1. Too expensive. "I don't have money like you do. I can't afford nice clothes and jewelry like yours." This is the big one, so let's start here. Granted, there are those who legitimately cannot afford more than very basic attire, but even during the Great Depression every man owned a suit and took care of it. Every woman had a Sunday dress. It was unheard of not to own these. But we're living in today, so here's a timely remedy: Try looking into thrift shops, re-sales, and consignment stores in your area. My boys dress in khakis, button-down shirts (topped with sweaters in winter), dark socks, and belts every Sunday, and it costs under $10 per child, for the entire outfit. They look presentable, neat, and appropriate. Granted, I do think their hair could use a better combing!
As for myself, I find the vast majority of my outfits at thrift stores. The Goodwill in our area is a beautiful, small facility that has fitting rooms, a return policy, and a credit card system. I've found lots of pretty sweaters, blouses, pants, and skirts for around $3 a piece, and they are all in excellent condition and appropriate for the season. I HATE shopping, so I use very little of my time to find clothing. It doesn't take much effort or money. Let's be honest. If it's not getting done, then it's not a priority. When I finally digested that and accepted the responsibility, the job was already half done.
2. No time. "Hey, I'm lucky to get there (meaning, to Mass) at all." What we are really saying is not that we are lucky, but that the Church is lucky that we have decided to attend. I do think we're lucky. What I mean is that we are lucky to be Catholic and witnesses to the greatest prayer on earth, the Mass, to Christ and Heaven touching our world right on the altar in front of us. No time? Consider this: It takes the same amount of time to pull on a pair of jeans as it does to pull on dress pants or khakis. Even less time to put on a dress. No time for ironing? My kids' pants haven't seen an iron in years. Just wash, dry, and hang up. It's a new invention (not really) called wrinkle free, care free fabrics. Gotta love that stuff.
3. Peer pressure. "My kid feels like a dope when he has to wear dressy clothes in front of his friends." Ah, yes. I've heard this one, too, from my own boys. Teens have the ability of taking a simple line of logic and using it to its extreme. Hey, we're not talking about a suit and tie here, just a nice pair of pants and shirt. Don't give in. We're not at Mass to please some buddies. We're there because Christ gave Himself to us on the cross. We should take a good look at a crucifix, and then tell Christ, who was stripped and humiliated and tortured, that we don't want our kid to feel out of place. We really should feel some shame if we do that and still feel right about it.
In addition, kids should be given the chance to rise to the challenge--it's all part of growing into a sound adult. Last school year, I led the local Boy Scout Troop in earning the Catholic Religion Emblem, the Ad Altare Dei. After much thought, but from the beginning, I realized that the boys should wear their dress uniforms (called Class A's) to each of our meetings. This would help show our respect for the topic at hand, Our Lord and the Catholic faith. I had been told that the decision should have rested with the boys, not me. But I disagreed. I was there to teach the scouts, and this was definitely part of the lesson. I held my ground, took a deep breath, and announced it to the kids. I heard not a whimper. No problem. Why? Because each boy did it, so no one was considered odd for dressing appropriately. It was expected and supported. They rose to the challenge. Wouldn't it be great if our children and their friends got together and agreed to dress appropriately for Mass? To unite? To be "cool" by showing Our Lord the respect He deserves? Let's start by making that pact in our own homes.
4. Husband pressure. "My husband thinks it's ridiculous to dress up and won't get behind me on this." I personally have never had to deal with this. My husband has always supported the boys dressing for Mass, but this is an argument I hear a lot from moms, so let's address it. I suspect that most husbands would LOVE to see their wives in something feminine and pretty, instead of the daily frumpy jeans and T-shirts. Even though my husband doesn't attend Mass, he does notice my appearance on Sunday morning, because it is the only time I get to play dress up. He once said, "I need to take you out, so you can dress like that for me!" I'm not talking party clothes here, just outfits that present you as the Catholic woman you are. I wouldn't be surprised that after seeing his wife dress in this way, a husband would gradually support her cause. Even if he doesn't, then the wife is doing well for her own soul.
There's something special about preparing to see our Lord, even if it's done under pressure, and the interior can't help but get in the right frame of mind. Yes, even when the kids are driving you nuts. (To learn more about the beauty of being a Catholic woman and living out your femininity, you might want to click on The Authentic Catholic Woman: A Book Review.)
5. It's a hassle. "It's a job just getting everyone out the door each Sunday." Oh, boy, do I hear you!! Last weekend, I was upset with my kids for dragging their feet--again. We have been attending Mass every Sunday at 10:30 since they were babies, and still it's a mad dash. Every family goes through this. Yes, it is a hassle. But let's remember the "hassle" our Lord went through so He could give us ("us", as in you, and you, and you.... I don't mean this collectively) His body, blood, soul, and divinity in the Holy Eucharist. Since my boys are teenagers, they are old enough to understand, and so I finally laid down the law: Be in the car at 10:00. If I leave without you, you are grounded. No yelling, I promise. Just grounded. (Which means they go to bed very early that night. Not a tough grounding, I know, but they definitely don't like it.) Gulp. I think I had better be on time! I will let you know how this works out. Please know that you are not alone! Hang in there and don't give in!
6. God loves us anyway. "And we love him with all our hearts and minds." Hmm. Doesn't seem that we're using our minds here. By saying, "God loves us anyway," what we really mean is, "No matter how little we give Him, He still loves us." Do we really want to give little? Most of us really don't intend on doing this. But intentions and actions are two entirely different things. It's not good enough to intend on giving Him our hearts and minds. We have to do this through our actions, and it's very pleasing to Our Dear Lord. And when it comes down to it, just how difficult is it--really--to dress appropriately for Mass? You might want to check out What Kind Of Spouse Are You?. It's a post about being devoted to Christ and how we show it.
Phew! I'm exhausted! This has been a very enlightening post for me, and I hope it has been for you, too. It's good for me to review the sound reasons for presenting ourselves to Our Messiah in a pleasing way. Please share your thoughts on this. I need to sign off now. God bless all of you!
Please feel free to share this post with family and friends.
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Monday, May 23, 2011
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
What Can We Do For the Non-Believers In Our Lives?
by Kathleen Blease
They are all around us. At work, at home, in the stores, on the road. For some of us, they are part of our family. Perhaps you married into a family of non-believers. Not just non-Catholics, but non-believers all together. You are a part of their family and they are a part of yours. There should be some sort of harmony, or at least you should be somewhere on the same page, yet you are worlds away.
It's difficult to live in your faith and at the same time be in harmony with those who embrace the world and all its trappings--materialism, hedonism, money, success, lust, notariety, and so on. Temporal promises and gains. Now let's be honest--these things enter into all our lives at some point or another and in different doses, and we can't help but become tempted. Sometimes it comes upon me when I'm flipping through the latest William-Sonoma catalog (small dose), or when I look at magazines and conclude that our house should look just as beautiful right now (big dose), or when I wish my husband would be strong and healthy already, like he used to be (very big dose).
But what happens when the worldly gifts are some one's goal in life, when they become his obsession? How does a Catholic relate? We all struggle with this, especially me. I have known folks who live by and in the world for many, many years. They know me, they know how my husband and I prioritize our life and raise our children in the Catholic Faith, and yet my eyes have seen no change in them. Each year, they strive to win more awards, make more money, buy more things, and travel the world. They take barely a notice of Christmas or Easter, and Lent is simply the past tense of the act of lending out moola. It makes me a little anxious, and I fall into a sea of questions. Have my family and I not influenced them even just a little bit? Just what am I expecting from them anyway? A major transition? A conversion? Are my prayers and efforts useless? Why aren't they happy? Do they see that I'm happy? Don't they want a more peaceful life? Are they happy worrying, worrying, worrying? How do they carry their load without Christ? Why are they on the fast track? Don't they get tired? To whom do they turn when they are overwhelmed and scared? Themselves? Money? Buying more things?
One day, I took my frustrations with me to confession. Each year, during the holidays, my angst from watching friends and family embrace the world while rejecting Heaven mounts so high, it needles me to take my eyes off Heaven myself. And I become angry and very, very impatient.
Father assured me, "I'm sure this is frustrating. You will just need to keep trying to show them the love of Christ. And pray for them. That is all you can do."
I was hoping for a magical formula, but deep down I knew he was right. You know, when Christ taught the apostles how to be servants of God, he didn't start a major scholarship program, launch a non-profit organization, or dig wells all over the world. (All good things, of course.) No, he did something very, very simple. It was so simple, Peter was appalled. Essentially he said, "Wash my feet? A slave doesn't even do that!" But Christ corrected him. It is simple, loving, and selfless. Here is where the work of Christ begins. Something as simple as a prayer for someone you find hard to love, for someone who openly rejects Our Savior.
And it can change us, too. Set out to change someone else, and prayer winds up changing us. At the very least, prayer reminds us that they, too, are children of God, even if they don't know it or if they choose to reject Him. They sadly have given up their birth right, but knowing that Our Heavenly Father, the one we love most, loves them, too, can make things a little easier and put our hearts with the One who is truly hurting. Imagine being Our Heavenly Father, who loves every tiny piece of His Creation way beyond human comprehension...and then to be rejected. He waits and longs to hear from them, but He doesn't. They are lost to Him...and He still waits.
This makes me think of the Parable of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11). My favorite character is the father.
When the son finally decided to go home, his father was waiting for him. Think about what that means. He must have been waiting and watching a little bit each and every day, to be sure that he wouldn't miss his son's return. Every day, anxiously waiting to see if his son just might be coming around the bend. He faithfully waited and didn't give up. And when the father spotted him, the boy was still far down the road, probably still rehearsing what he was going to say to his old man, mustering up the courage and resolve.
But there was no time for that as far as the father was concerned. When he spotted his son making his way toward home, he ran down the road to meet him as fast as he could.
Of course, through the father in this parable, Christ was depicting His own Father in Heaven. Does Our Heavenly Father worry about non-believers--those who think they can go out into the world away from Him, do all things on their own and be their own masters? Christ made it very clear that His Heavenly Father does indeed love and worry about his prodigal sons and daughters and would celebrate their return to His home of faith. (Of course, in many ways we all become prodigal children at some point and in small ways, but that would be another post. This post is describing those who have made it their life goal to be their own masters and who outwardly reject God and Christ.)
I like to add one more image to the story, something any parent would appreciate. Can't you picture the father longing to hear news of his lost son? With so much silence between them, wouldn't he long for any kind of news, any kind at all?
If a father heard nothing of his son who went out into the world, imagine how comforted he would be to receive a letter from a friend, saying "Your son is safe. He is with me."
Father was right: "Keep trying to show them the love of Christ. And pray for them." At the very least, we can say to Our Heavenly Father, "He is with me." At least it's a start. I understand. I struggle to do this, too. I do.
God bless!
 |
| Perhaps Our Heavely Father longs to hear, "He is safe. He is with me." |
It's difficult to live in your faith and at the same time be in harmony with those who embrace the world and all its trappings--materialism, hedonism, money, success, lust, notariety, and so on. Temporal promises and gains. Now let's be honest--these things enter into all our lives at some point or another and in different doses, and we can't help but become tempted. Sometimes it comes upon me when I'm flipping through the latest William-Sonoma catalog (small dose), or when I look at magazines and conclude that our house should look just as beautiful right now (big dose), or when I wish my husband would be strong and healthy already, like he used to be (very big dose).
But what happens when the worldly gifts are some one's goal in life, when they become his obsession? How does a Catholic relate? We all struggle with this, especially me. I have known folks who live by and in the world for many, many years. They know me, they know how my husband and I prioritize our life and raise our children in the Catholic Faith, and yet my eyes have seen no change in them. Each year, they strive to win more awards, make more money, buy more things, and travel the world. They take barely a notice of Christmas or Easter, and Lent is simply the past tense of the act of lending out moola. It makes me a little anxious, and I fall into a sea of questions. Have my family and I not influenced them even just a little bit? Just what am I expecting from them anyway? A major transition? A conversion? Are my prayers and efforts useless? Why aren't they happy? Do they see that I'm happy? Don't they want a more peaceful life? Are they happy worrying, worrying, worrying? How do they carry their load without Christ? Why are they on the fast track? Don't they get tired? To whom do they turn when they are overwhelmed and scared? Themselves? Money? Buying more things?
One day, I took my frustrations with me to confession. Each year, during the holidays, my angst from watching friends and family embrace the world while rejecting Heaven mounts so high, it needles me to take my eyes off Heaven myself. And I become angry and very, very impatient.
Father assured me, "I'm sure this is frustrating. You will just need to keep trying to show them the love of Christ. And pray for them. That is all you can do."
I was hoping for a magical formula, but deep down I knew he was right. You know, when Christ taught the apostles how to be servants of God, he didn't start a major scholarship program, launch a non-profit organization, or dig wells all over the world. (All good things, of course.) No, he did something very, very simple. It was so simple, Peter was appalled. Essentially he said, "Wash my feet? A slave doesn't even do that!" But Christ corrected him. It is simple, loving, and selfless. Here is where the work of Christ begins. Something as simple as a prayer for someone you find hard to love, for someone who openly rejects Our Savior.
And it can change us, too. Set out to change someone else, and prayer winds up changing us. At the very least, prayer reminds us that they, too, are children of God, even if they don't know it or if they choose to reject Him. They sadly have given up their birth right, but knowing that Our Heavenly Father, the one we love most, loves them, too, can make things a little easier and put our hearts with the One who is truly hurting. Imagine being Our Heavenly Father, who loves every tiny piece of His Creation way beyond human comprehension...and then to be rejected. He waits and longs to hear from them, but He doesn't. They are lost to Him...and He still waits.
This makes me think of the Parable of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11). My favorite character is the father.
When the son finally decided to go home, his father was waiting for him. Think about what that means. He must have been waiting and watching a little bit each and every day, to be sure that he wouldn't miss his son's return. Every day, anxiously waiting to see if his son just might be coming around the bend. He faithfully waited and didn't give up. And when the father spotted him, the boy was still far down the road, probably still rehearsing what he was going to say to his old man, mustering up the courage and resolve.
But there was no time for that as far as the father was concerned. When he spotted his son making his way toward home, he ran down the road to meet him as fast as he could.
Of course, through the father in this parable, Christ was depicting His own Father in Heaven. Does Our Heavenly Father worry about non-believers--those who think they can go out into the world away from Him, do all things on their own and be their own masters? Christ made it very clear that His Heavenly Father does indeed love and worry about his prodigal sons and daughters and would celebrate their return to His home of faith. (Of course, in many ways we all become prodigal children at some point and in small ways, but that would be another post. This post is describing those who have made it their life goal to be their own masters and who outwardly reject God and Christ.)
I like to add one more image to the story, something any parent would appreciate. Can't you picture the father longing to hear news of his lost son? With so much silence between them, wouldn't he long for any kind of news, any kind at all?
If a father heard nothing of his son who went out into the world, imagine how comforted he would be to receive a letter from a friend, saying "Your son is safe. He is with me."
Father was right: "Keep trying to show them the love of Christ. And pray for them." At the very least, we can say to Our Heavenly Father, "He is with me." At least it's a start. I understand. I struggle to do this, too. I do.
God bless!
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Staying Faithful Today: A Book Review
by Kathleen Blease
...as the family goes so goes society. Think about it. If fidelity toward the one to whom you made a lifelong vow is not possible to keep, then just what else is failing in life?--K. Blease
True fidelity is at the crux of our person hood. It defines who we are, no? Are you a faithful friend? An honest co-worker? A devoted parent? A loving spouse? All these definitions hinge on our intrinsic ability to practice fidelity.
The quality of our community rests on this. Have you ever met someone who doesn't seem to practice fidelity? This person can throw us off balance. We never know what we can say in his presence, how he might use what he knows about us. Or how he mocks our fidelity to our community, to our children, and to our spouse as just foolishness. He is looking out for Number One! Just work in an office for a short time, and chances are pretty good you just might meet him. His views and actions are disturbingly temporal and self-involved.
Sadly, this way of life invades our culture. It can be discouraging.
When The Catholic Company made this book available to us reviewers, I was hoping to find pearls of wisdom, specifically about fidelity in marriage. After all, as the family goes so goes society. Think about it. If fidelity toward the one to whom you have made a lifelong vow is not possible to keep, then just what else is failing in life?
I explained to the company's review coordinator that my goal was to provide this book to my readers in order to help them (you) understand their (your) marriage vows and how to live them out. Me, too. I, like everyone else can use the instruction in grasping the deeper and lasting intentions of Holy Matrimony. It's a lesson never wasted.
Alas, my goal was much smaller than what this book offered.
Father McBride digs deep into scripture and our Lord's teachings to unfold the true guise of fidelity. It is not just for marriage, and after reading this book, I feel kind of silly for approaching it in only this way.
Father begins with a much bigger view. His first two chapters aply explain that fidelity is not a man-made concept. It comes straight from Heaven. I'm thinking about when, many years ago, someone told me that monogamy was not part of our nature. "Men," he told me, "are not made to live that way. We are animals, too." (Don't worry, it wasn't my husband who told me this.) I'm sure this man is not alone in believing this idea. Father sets it straight. As a matter of fact, we are made in God's image (the animals are not) and God is fidelity. I particularly love Chapter Two: God Is Always Faithful To Us. It is worth the price of the book right there.
Notice the chapter titles. Here they are:
Introduction
Chapter One: If You Don't Love, You Will Not Be Faithful
Chapter Two: God Is Always Faithful to Us
Chapter Three: Be Faithful to Your Real Self
Chapter Four: Stay Faithful to Your Friends
Chapter Five: Stay Faithful to Your Communities
Chapter Six: Stay Faithful to Your Marriage
Chapter Seven: Behold, A Faithful Priest
Notes
Of course I would not be surprised if you are already living this kind of life--or are at least striving to do so. But Fr. McBride gives us specifics, and I always like specifics. They sort of clump together to act as one big affirmation for those of us who think we are stumbling through life like a bumbling fool. In a culture that makes our faith countercultural, every affirmation that's steeped in Christ is certainly much needed and should be welcome. In short, you are getting it right, and you should keep trying, despite the hurts that might come your way.
My only suggestion to the author is that I would like to see more insight about marriage in his sixth chapter. I believe it's his shortest discussion. However, I make this suggestion with some hesitation. After many years of marriage, I can see--with a bit of retrospect applied--that Father's advice is excellent. It is simple and pithy yet well placed. Perhaps these simple directions are powerful enough to guide--and even heal--a marriage going over the bumpy road. Still, when I got to the end of the chapter, I thought: That's it? I guess I had to give it some time to let it seep in, then I could see his wisdom in keeping it simple. It's digestible.
Lastly, I'd like to tell you now much I enjoyed Father's final chapter, "Behold, A Faithful Priest," in which he openly and frankly discusses celibacy and what it is like to live as a celibate. If you ever wondered why priests must remain celibate (at least as they are in the western rites), you will find plenty of answers in this chapter. I always thought highly of our priests, but this gave me a much deeper appreciation for how they live out their calling to Christ, bound to His bride the Church. Perhaps this would be a chapter worth sharing with our older sons and daughters.
Come to think of it, the entire book would make excellent reading for our high school seniors.
Staying Faithful Today is a pleasure to read, written in a conversational tone. It also provides plenty of scripture as its backbone. The book is also designed to be used in discussion groups, giving thought-provoking questions and discernible prayers at the end of each chapter. Perhaps your parish would be interested in reading it among men's prayer groups, women's and moms' groups, and RCIA.
About the Author: Alfred McBride, O. PRAEM., holds a diploma in catechetics from Lumen Vitae, Brussels, and doctorate in religious education from the Catholic University of America, Washington, D.C. He has written many books, including a series on the Bible, four books on the new Catechism of the Catholic Church; A Priest Forever: Nine Signs of Renewal and Hope; A Short History of the Mass; and The Story of the Church.
This review was written as part of the Catholic book reviewer program from The Catholic Company. Visit The Catholic Company to find more information on Staying Faithful by Alfred McBride, O. PRAEM. They are also a great source for serenity prayer and baptism gifts.
Enjoy and happy reading.
God bless.
Staying Faithful Today: To God, Ourselves, One Another
by Alfred McBride, O. PRAEM.
St. Anthony Messenger Press
Paperback, 95 pgs., list price $13.99
...as the family goes so goes society. Think about it. If fidelity toward the one to whom you made a lifelong vow is not possible to keep, then just what else is failing in life?--K. Blease
True fidelity is at the crux of our person hood. It defines who we are, no? Are you a faithful friend? An honest co-worker? A devoted parent? A loving spouse? All these definitions hinge on our intrinsic ability to practice fidelity.
The quality of our community rests on this. Have you ever met someone who doesn't seem to practice fidelity? This person can throw us off balance. We never know what we can say in his presence, how he might use what he knows about us. Or how he mocks our fidelity to our community, to our children, and to our spouse as just foolishness. He is looking out for Number One! Just work in an office for a short time, and chances are pretty good you just might meet him. His views and actions are disturbingly temporal and self-involved.
Sadly, this way of life invades our culture. It can be discouraging.
When The Catholic Company made this book available to us reviewers, I was hoping to find pearls of wisdom, specifically about fidelity in marriage. After all, as the family goes so goes society. Think about it. If fidelity toward the one to whom you have made a lifelong vow is not possible to keep, then just what else is failing in life?
I explained to the company's review coordinator that my goal was to provide this book to my readers in order to help them (you) understand their (your) marriage vows and how to live them out. Me, too. I, like everyone else can use the instruction in grasping the deeper and lasting intentions of Holy Matrimony. It's a lesson never wasted.
Alas, my goal was much smaller than what this book offered.
Father McBride digs deep into scripture and our Lord's teachings to unfold the true guise of fidelity. It is not just for marriage, and after reading this book, I feel kind of silly for approaching it in only this way.
Father begins with a much bigger view. His first two chapters aply explain that fidelity is not a man-made concept. It comes straight from Heaven. I'm thinking about when, many years ago, someone told me that monogamy was not part of our nature. "Men," he told me, "are not made to live that way. We are animals, too." (Don't worry, it wasn't my husband who told me this.) I'm sure this man is not alone in believing this idea. Father sets it straight. As a matter of fact, we are made in God's image (the animals are not) and God is fidelity. I particularly love Chapter Two: God Is Always Faithful To Us. It is worth the price of the book right there.
Notice the chapter titles. Here they are:
Introduction
Chapter One: If You Don't Love, You Will Not Be Faithful
Chapter Two: God Is Always Faithful to Us
Chapter Three: Be Faithful to Your Real Self
Chapter Four: Stay Faithful to Your Friends
Chapter Five: Stay Faithful to Your Communities
Chapter Six: Stay Faithful to Your Marriage
Chapter Seven: Behold, A Faithful Priest
Notes
Of course I would not be surprised if you are already living this kind of life--or are at least striving to do so. But Fr. McBride gives us specifics, and I always like specifics. They sort of clump together to act as one big affirmation for those of us who think we are stumbling through life like a bumbling fool. In a culture that makes our faith countercultural, every affirmation that's steeped in Christ is certainly much needed and should be welcome. In short, you are getting it right, and you should keep trying, despite the hurts that might come your way.
My only suggestion to the author is that I would like to see more insight about marriage in his sixth chapter. I believe it's his shortest discussion. However, I make this suggestion with some hesitation. After many years of marriage, I can see--with a bit of retrospect applied--that Father's advice is excellent. It is simple and pithy yet well placed. Perhaps these simple directions are powerful enough to guide--and even heal--a marriage going over the bumpy road. Still, when I got to the end of the chapter, I thought: That's it? I guess I had to give it some time to let it seep in, then I could see his wisdom in keeping it simple. It's digestible.
Lastly, I'd like to tell you now much I enjoyed Father's final chapter, "Behold, A Faithful Priest," in which he openly and frankly discusses celibacy and what it is like to live as a celibate. If you ever wondered why priests must remain celibate (at least as they are in the western rites), you will find plenty of answers in this chapter. I always thought highly of our priests, but this gave me a much deeper appreciation for how they live out their calling to Christ, bound to His bride the Church. Perhaps this would be a chapter worth sharing with our older sons and daughters.
Come to think of it, the entire book would make excellent reading for our high school seniors.
Staying Faithful Today is a pleasure to read, written in a conversational tone. It also provides plenty of scripture as its backbone. The book is also designed to be used in discussion groups, giving thought-provoking questions and discernible prayers at the end of each chapter. Perhaps your parish would be interested in reading it among men's prayer groups, women's and moms' groups, and RCIA.
About the Author: Alfred McBride, O. PRAEM., holds a diploma in catechetics from Lumen Vitae, Brussels, and doctorate in religious education from the Catholic University of America, Washington, D.C. He has written many books, including a series on the Bible, four books on the new Catechism of the Catholic Church; A Priest Forever: Nine Signs of Renewal and Hope; A Short History of the Mass; and The Story of the Church.
This review was written as part of the Catholic book reviewer program from The Catholic Company. Visit The Catholic Company to find more information on Staying Faithful by Alfred McBride, O. PRAEM. They are also a great source for serenity prayer and baptism gifts.
Enjoy and happy reading.
God bless.
Monday, March 28, 2011
from I Can't Wait to Meet My Daddy
Introduction
You're about to become a father. A daddy. Soon the little wonder who has been filling your days (and sleepless nights) with anticipation will be in your arms warm and soft. The word innocent finally has meaning.
How is it this beautiful creature holds the entire future in such a tiny heart? All your hopes and dreams--all that you are, all that you ever wanted to be--alseep in your arms, a beautiful package.
Those sweet eyes will be looking to you for what the world is, or what it's supposed to be. Those delicate fingers will hold yours tightly now and, perhaps, at your final hour.
This person you helped make has never been here before, now will be ever again. You baby is like no other. Unique in every way. And because of this little one, your heart will be stirred, thrilled, overwhelmed, maybe even scared, and suddenly your own needs will fall away from the center of your world, replaced by your child.
Still, no matter how much you want to give your baby, there is just one thing every child wants: Daddy. That's you!
A daddy. What a wondeful gift to give your baby. It will last a lifetime.
Kathleen Blease
from I Can't Wait to Meet My Daddy, a gift book for expectant dads.
You're about to become a father. A daddy. Soon the little wonder who has been filling your days (and sleepless nights) with anticipation will be in your arms warm and soft. The word innocent finally has meaning.
How is it this beautiful creature holds the entire future in such a tiny heart? All your hopes and dreams--all that you are, all that you ever wanted to be--alseep in your arms, a beautiful package.
Those sweet eyes will be looking to you for what the world is, or what it's supposed to be. Those delicate fingers will hold yours tightly now and, perhaps, at your final hour.
This person you helped make has never been here before, now will be ever again. You baby is like no other. Unique in every way. And because of this little one, your heart will be stirred, thrilled, overwhelmed, maybe even scared, and suddenly your own needs will fall away from the center of your world, replaced by your child.
Still, no matter how much you want to give your baby, there is just one thing every child wants: Daddy. That's you!
A daddy. What a wondeful gift to give your baby. It will last a lifetime.
Kathleen Blease
from I Can't Wait to Meet My Daddy, a gift book for expectant dads.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
St. Joseph: The Greatest of All Earthly Fathers
There was a time when my husband and I were facing some very difficult decisions, the kind that would change our family's life for a very long time. It was wrenching to face those challenges, but we did...with the help of St. Joseph...and succeeded.
This was when I finally learned more about Jesus' foster father and why he is the greatest of all earthly fathers. What a gift he gives to us!
At the end of the post linked below, I give you the prayer of intercession I turned to during those tough times. After I said my rosary, I prayed this prayer, then--and this is important--I reflected on St. Joseph's role as husband, father, protector, and provider. In other words, I didn't just rattle off the prayer and expect something magical to happen, although magic did happen, which I noticed only in retrospect. But in the meantime, I was so happy to be able to call upon him in Heaven, and then ask him to take my prayers to his little boy, Jesus. He was a great comfort to us.
Click the link below to read my reflection on St. Joseph. God bless!
Kathleen's Catholic: St. Joseph: The Greatest of All Earthly Fathers: "by Kathleen Blease What a tender sight to see: Our Lord, a little boy, leaning his head on his daddy’s chest. Do you remember your little ..."
Friday, March 11, 2011
Got Family Meal Time? Better to Say YES. Here's Why.
Allison at Totus Tuus Family & Catholic Homeschool found a very interesting report from the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse. It explains how the family meal benefits our children in a plethora of ways. It's almost shocking just how much children are affected when the family meal is absent in their lives.
As a parent, of a child of any age, you should read this.
Click here and travel on over to Allison's blog and read all about how eating with Mom and Dad --and learning table manners, among other things--protects our children from otherwise chilling realities.
God bless!
As a parent, of a child of any age, you should read this.
Click here and travel on over to Allison's blog and read all about how eating with Mom and Dad --and learning table manners, among other things--protects our children from otherwise chilling realities.
God bless!
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Clearing Away the Angst and the Dust
This is a whole new thing for me, to have two teenage boys. They were at each other's throats again yesterday, as they have been for months. This is the part of homeschooling I wish I could simply erase. Can't we go back to the elementary years when the biggest tempratantrum was over a little spelling assignment and the two of them wrestled on the living room rug?
I've been chalking up the tension to the typical wintry cabin fever, and I've been told that this is normal for teenage boys. But my motherly instincts are telling me otherwise, that this is not normal for brothers who are otherwise very close.
What gives?
I have to admit that I haven't been the cheeriest family member among us, either. I wonder if my own interior angst is directly affecting the boys.
My impatience.
My selfishness.
My eyes not on Heaven.
My days have a decisive lack of prayer, contemplation, petitions, and thanksgiving.
I feel like I am alone, struggling to educate and raise the boys, struggling to care for the house, struggling to help my husband in his own struggles.
In many ways, things have been looking up. All the things we have prayed for are happening. Roger is gaining some strength back, and his blood tests prove that his health is slowly improving. (He looks so much better! Just a few weeks ago, he called the boys outside to have a snowball battle. I loved watching him from the kitchen, running through the snow while carving a softball in his hands, sneaking around the garage, looking for his next victim. He hadn't been able to do that in ages.) His business has new and bigger opportunities, offered to him through just one timely phone call. I have two writing projects on the table. And the boys are healthy, doing well in their schoolwork, and enjoying their activities in the parish's youth group as well as Boy Scouts.
And yet you could cut the tension in this house with a knife! Why?
Well, all I can think of now is thank goodness Lent is here. Talk about needing to get back on track!
A chance to pray and contemplate again.
A chance to fast and give a little gift each day to Our Lord, starting with my morning cup of coffee. The operative word is starting.
A chance to put my eyes back on Heaven.
A chance to go from my desolation to consolation--that is, the consolation I can offer to Jesus.
A chance to clear away the sins that have been piling up.
A chance to turn to Our Blessed Mother and observe the operations of her soul.
Of course, I could have done these things--and had the proper mindset--throughout the year, avoiding all this angst that has accumulated. But I am human, a mom human, and I have a human habit of losing track of these imperative devotions when the world knocks on my door with homeschool research papers and fair projects, with knitting projects, with writing projects...house cleaning, shuttling kids, groceries...yadda, yadda, yadda. The noise of busyness!
I ignored our quiet and gentle Lord, who has been waiting for me all along.
Have a wonderful Ash Wednesday.
I've been chalking up the tension to the typical wintry cabin fever, and I've been told that this is normal for teenage boys. But my motherly instincts are telling me otherwise, that this is not normal for brothers who are otherwise very close.
What gives?
I have to admit that I haven't been the cheeriest family member among us, either. I wonder if my own interior angst is directly affecting the boys.
My impatience.
My selfishness.
My eyes not on Heaven.
My days have a decisive lack of prayer, contemplation, petitions, and thanksgiving.
I feel like I am alone, struggling to educate and raise the boys, struggling to care for the house, struggling to help my husband in his own struggles.
In many ways, things have been looking up. All the things we have prayed for are happening. Roger is gaining some strength back, and his blood tests prove that his health is slowly improving. (He looks so much better! Just a few weeks ago, he called the boys outside to have a snowball battle. I loved watching him from the kitchen, running through the snow while carving a softball in his hands, sneaking around the garage, looking for his next victim. He hadn't been able to do that in ages.) His business has new and bigger opportunities, offered to him through just one timely phone call. I have two writing projects on the table. And the boys are healthy, doing well in their schoolwork, and enjoying their activities in the parish's youth group as well as Boy Scouts.
And yet you could cut the tension in this house with a knife! Why?
Well, all I can think of now is thank goodness Lent is here. Talk about needing to get back on track!
A chance to pray and contemplate again.
A chance to fast and give a little gift each day to Our Lord, starting with my morning cup of coffee. The operative word is starting.
A chance to put my eyes back on Heaven.
A chance to go from my desolation to consolation--that is, the consolation I can offer to Jesus.
A chance to clear away the sins that have been piling up.
A chance to turn to Our Blessed Mother and observe the operations of her soul.
Of course, I could have done these things--and had the proper mindset--throughout the year, avoiding all this angst that has accumulated. But I am human, a mom human, and I have a human habit of losing track of these imperative devotions when the world knocks on my door with homeschool research papers and fair projects, with knitting projects, with writing projects...house cleaning, shuttling kids, groceries...yadda, yadda, yadda. The noise of busyness!
I ignored our quiet and gentle Lord, who has been waiting for me all along.
Have a wonderful Ash Wednesday.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
The Knitting Madonna
I love this image of Mary and Jesus, from a blog called The Careless Catholic. I think it reflects the Domestic Church beautifully! Jesus is a loving son and student, studying the Word. Mary is a caring and productive mother. She is knitting a garment for her son. I especially like how they are surrounded by God's bounty.
It also foreshadows Our Lord's crucifixion. See the angel holding the cross, and Jesus looking at him? Did you notice that the garment Mary is knitting is red? Perhaps this shows that in their daily lives they were ready to do God's will. The more I look, the more I see...such as what appears to a be a throne (or altar) behind Mary. Your thoughts?
Many thanks to fellow Catholic blogger, Kelly, for finding it and sharing it with us! The Careless Catholic: The Knitting Madonna...: "Detail from 'Visit of the Angel', from the right wing of the Buxtehude Altar.1400 - 1410Meister Bertram von Minden (1340 - 1414) I lov..."
To read similar articles, click on a label below.
It also foreshadows Our Lord's crucifixion. See the angel holding the cross, and Jesus looking at him? Did you notice that the garment Mary is knitting is red? Perhaps this shows that in their daily lives they were ready to do God's will. The more I look, the more I see...such as what appears to a be a throne (or altar) behind Mary. Your thoughts?
Many thanks to fellow Catholic blogger, Kelly, for finding it and sharing it with us! The Careless Catholic: The Knitting Madonna...: "Detail from 'Visit of the Angel', from the right wing of the Buxtehude Altar.1400 - 1410Meister Bertram von Minden (1340 - 1414) I lov..."
To read similar articles, click on a label below.
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Full-Time Cop, Part-Time Preacher: "It's not justice we need. It's grace."
I can't wait to see this movie! Please link and share with others.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Why Flip-Flops and Blue Jeans Attend Sunday Mass
Right now, I think my parents would laugh, and laugh hard, if they were to read this post. Growing up, I was just as difficult about dressing for Mass as any teenager, and that was....er....okay, well... thirty years ago (Yikes!). This issue is tougher to address these days, isn't it? Why is that? Because those teens are now adults (that's us), and we still want to do our own thing. Boy, do I understand!
There are two ladies who completely changed my mind and convinced me that jeans and flip-flops have no place in Sunday worship. First and foremost is my mother. Mom wouldn't give up. When we attended Mass with our parents, all four of us were expected to dress appropriately and pass a basic look-over. Of course, I whined and cried when I couldn't wear my brand new Calvin Kleins. And, yes, I found ways to wear them anyway....like waiting until the very last nano-second to show up in the dining room where Mom was waiting. Sigh. I remember, I remember. (Sorry, Mom.)
The second lady who had a big impact on me entered my life in my adult years, after I was married. My brother's wife, Maria, taught me a thing or two about presenting myself at Mass, in front of Our Precious Christ. Maria grew up in a large family who immigrated from Brazil when she was a child. Her mother insisted that the girls wore dresses always. And they all looked beautiful. They learned to be aware of their appearances as children of God at all times, not just at Mass. Over the years, their example has very much affected me. I have to tell you, the ladies in Maria's family are beautifully, modestly, and simply dressed. They are in no way frumpy or matronly, and they believe in maintaining their appearances without gaudy remedies, such as thick mascara or lipstick.
I have made a one-eighty, from a tempramental teenager to a Mom who is watching over her sons' souls. So I'd like to share with you how I have been able to work myself through the various arguments against dressing appropriately for Mass. And, yes, it does have to do with the soul. I'll cover that briefly below. Here we go...
1. Too expensive. "I don't have money like you do. I can't afford nice clothes and jewelry like yours." This is the big one, so let's start here. Granted, there are those who legitimately cannot afford more than very basic attire, but even during the Great Depression every man owned a suit and took care of it. Every woman had a Sunday dress. It was unheard of not to own these. But we're living in today, so here's a timely remedy: Try looking into thrift shops, re-sales, and consignment stores in your area. My boys dress in khakis, button-down shirts (topped with sweaters in winter), dark socks, and belts every Sunday, and it costs under $10 per child, for the entire outfit. They look presentable, neat, and appropriate. Granted, I do think their hair could use a better combing!
As for myself, I find the vast majority of my outfits at thrift stores. The Goodwill in our area is a beautiful, small facility that has fitting rooms, a return policy, and a credit card system. I've found lots of pretty sweaters, blouses, pants, and skirts for around $3 a piece, and they are all in excellent condition and appropriate for the season. I HATE shopping, so I use very little of my time to find clothing. It doesn't take much effort or money. Let's be honest. If it's not getting done, then it's not a priority. When I finally digested that and accepted the responsibility, the job was already half done.
As for myself, I find the vast majority of my outfits at thrift stores. The Goodwill in our area is a beautiful, small facility that has fitting rooms, a return policy, and a credit card system. I've found lots of pretty sweaters, blouses, pants, and skirts for around $3 a piece, and they are all in excellent condition and appropriate for the season. I HATE shopping, so I use very little of my time to find clothing. It doesn't take much effort or money. Let's be honest. If it's not getting done, then it's not a priority. When I finally digested that and accepted the responsibility, the job was already half done.
2. No time. "Hey, I'm lucky to get there (meaning, to Mass) at all." What we are really saying is not that we are lucky, but that the Church is lucky that we have decided to attend. I do think we're lucky. What I mean is that we are lucky to be Catholic and witnesses to the greatest prayer on earth, the Mass, to Christ and Heaven touching our world right on the altar in front of us. No time? Consider this: It takes the same amount of time to pull on a pair of jeans as it does to pull on dress pants or khakis. Even less time to put on a dress. No time for ironing? My kids' pants haven't seen an iron in years. Just wash, dry, and hang up. It's a new invention (not really) called wrinkle free, care free fabrics. Gotta love that stuff.
3. Peer pressure. "My kid feels like a dope when he has to wear dressy clothes in front of his friends." Ah, yes. I've heard this one, too, from my own boys. Teens have the ability of taking a simple line of logic and using it to its extreme. Hey, we're not talking about a suit and tie here, just a nice pair of pants and shirt. Don't give in. We're not at Mass to please some buddies. We're there because Christ gave Himself to us on the cross. We should take a good look at a crucifix, and then tell Christ, who was stripped and humiliated and tortured, that we don't want our kid to feel out of place. We really should feel some shame if we do that and still feel right about it.
In addition, kids should be given the chance to rise to the challenge--it's all part of growing into a sound adult. Last school year, I led the local Boy Scout Troop in earning the Catholic Religion Emblem, the Ad Altare Dei. After much thought, but from the beginning, I realized that the boys should wear their dress uniforms (called Class A's) to each of our meetings. This would help show our respect for the topic at hand, Our Lord and the Catholic faith. I had been told that the decision should have rested with the boys, not me. But I disagreed. I was there to teach the scouts, and this was definitely part of the lesson. I held my ground, took a deep breath, and announced it to the kids. I heard not a whimper. No problem. Why? Because each boy did it, so no one was considered odd for dressing appropriately. It was expected and supported. They rose to the challenge. Wouldn't it be great if our children and their friends got together and agreed to dress appropriately for Mass? To unite? To be "cool" by showing Our Lord the respect He deserves? Let's start by making that pact in our own homes.
In addition, kids should be given the chance to rise to the challenge--it's all part of growing into a sound adult. Last school year, I led the local Boy Scout Troop in earning the Catholic Religion Emblem, the Ad Altare Dei. After much thought, but from the beginning, I realized that the boys should wear their dress uniforms (called Class A's) to each of our meetings. This would help show our respect for the topic at hand, Our Lord and the Catholic faith. I had been told that the decision should have rested with the boys, not me. But I disagreed. I was there to teach the scouts, and this was definitely part of the lesson. I held my ground, took a deep breath, and announced it to the kids. I heard not a whimper. No problem. Why? Because each boy did it, so no one was considered odd for dressing appropriately. It was expected and supported. They rose to the challenge. Wouldn't it be great if our children and their friends got together and agreed to dress appropriately for Mass? To unite? To be "cool" by showing Our Lord the respect He deserves? Let's start by making that pact in our own homes.
4. Husband pressure. "My husband thinks it's ridiculous to dress up and won't get behind me on this."
I personally have never had to deal with this. My husband has always supported the boys dressing for Mass, but this is an argument I hear a lot from moms, so let's address it. I suspect that most husbands would LOVE to see their wives in something feminine and pretty, instead of the daily frumpy jeans and T-shirts. Even though my husband doesn't attend Mass, he does notice my appearance on Sunday morning, because it is the only time I get to play dress up. He once said, "I need to take you out, so you can dress like that for me!" I'm not talking party clothes here, just outfits that present you as the Catholic woman you are. I wouldn't be surprised that after seeing his wife dress in this way, a husband would gradually support her cause. Even if he doesn't, then the wife is doing well for her own soul.
There's something special about preparing to see our Lord, even if it's done under pressure, and the interior can't help but get in the right frame of mind. Yes, even when the kids are driving you nuts. (To learn more about the beauty of being a Catholic woman and living out your femininity, you might want to click on The Authentic Catholic Woman: A Book Review.)
There's something special about preparing to see our Lord, even if it's done under pressure, and the interior can't help but get in the right frame of mind. Yes, even when the kids are driving you nuts. (To learn more about the beauty of being a Catholic woman and living out your femininity, you might want to click on The Authentic Catholic Woman: A Book Review.)
5. It's a hassle. "It's a job just getting everyone out the door each Sunday." Oh, boy, do I hear you!! Last weekend, I was upset with my kids for dragging their feet--again. We have been attending Mass every Sunday at 10:30 since they were babies, and still it's a mad dash. Every family goes through this. Yes, it is a hassle. But let's remember the "hassle" our Lord went through so He could give us ("us", as in you, and you, and you.... I don't mean this collectively) His body, blood, soul, and divinity in the Holy Eucharist. Since my boys are teenagers, they are old enough to understand, and so I finally laid down the law: Be in the car at 10:00. If I leave without you, you are grounded. No yelling, I promise. Just grounded. (Which means they go to bed very early that night. Not a tough grounding, I know, but they definitely don't like it.) Gulp. I think I had better be on time! I will let you know how this works out. Please know that you are not alone! Hang in there and don't give in!
6. God loves us anyway. "And we love him with all our hearts and minds." Hmm. Doesn't seem that we're using our minds here. By saying, "God loves us anyway," what we really mean is, "No matter how little we give Him, He still loves us." Do we really want to give little? Most of us really don't intend on doing this. But intentions and actions are two entirely different things. It's not good enough to intend on giving Him our hearts and minds. We have to do this through our actions, and it's very pleasing to Our Dear Lord. And when it comes down to it, just how difficult is it--really--to dress appropriately for Mass? You might want to check out What Kind Of Spouse Are You?. It's a post about being devoted to Christ and how we show it.
Phew! I'm exhausted! This has been a very enlightening post for me, and I hope it has been for you, too. It's good for me to review the sound reasons for presenting ourselves to Our Messiah in a pleasing way. Please share your thoughts on this. I need to sign off now. God bless all of you!
Saturday, January 29, 2011
A Little Book, A Big Difference
My husband's project, I Can't Wait to Meet My Daddy, is doing very well, and we are grateful. It is a gift book for expectant daddies; Roger insisted on publishing it himself. Here is the story of how it all began, originally posted Jan. 20, 2010. Since then, Amazon and Barnes & Noble have regularly placed large orders. Many thanks for your support.
by Kathleen Blease
A man visited his mother two months before his first child was due. He, his mother, and his wife all expected a lovely healthy baby and were preparing with all the necessary and happy chores. The man’s mother wanted her son to know how excited she was for him, and how proud. So she gave him a little book. He didn’t have time to read it, so he thanked her for it and slipped it into his briefcase. Saying his goodbyes, he left his mother and drove home.
Little did he know that that evening his wife would deliver their baby two months too early, a tiny preemie with a tough time ahead of it. Together, the man and wife held each other as they watched the nurses and doctors care for their little one. The busyness of the hospital staff must have been daunting. They sat and watched, feeling helpless and wondering what the future held. And then the husband remembered the little book, the one he slipped into his briefcase. He went to his car and pulled it out and noticed the title, “I Can’t Wait to Meet My Daddy.” The man and his wife sat and read the words of the unborn child who was dreaming about his life with daddy. The man’s mother wrote to the author and told her the comfort they found in those words.
I have the privilege being that author. However, I have to admit right away that I am not responsible for this little book. It’s my husband. And, together, we receive many stories very much like this one. (I never did learn what happened to the little preemie, but I do hope that with the help of today’s miracle medicine, the little one is toddling about and making Grandma and Mama smile, along with Grandpa and Daddy.)
It all had a very simple beginning.
On Christmas Eve fourteen years ago, my husband and I were expecting our first child. All the gifts were wrapped and put under the tree, but I felt that there was still one to be made, something for my husband from his first-born son. I sat down in my tiny office in the attic and began to doodle ideas. The words, “I can’t wait to meet my daddy” came out, and so did a little book that I bound with a handmade cover. On Christmas day, my husband read the words I suspected our tiny son was thinking, eager to meet daddy, and he was deeply touched. For years after that, my husband insisted that it should be published.
When a few publishers told me that they loved the book but it didn’t suit their needs at the time, my husband took it upon himself to learn how to publish books. Now, if it were up to me, knowing something about what goes into publishing a glossy book (I’m from the publishing field), it would have stayed in the cedar chest. But my husband was driven and insistent, and he made a huge investment in time, talent, and treasure to publish I Can’t Wait to Meet My Daddy. Today, that book has helped thousands of wives and mothers tell new dads just how precious they are, and we receive calls and notes from so many mothers, grandmother, and great-grandmothers who purchased the book as a gift. As you can see, the stories they tell us are touching. And it is an honor and blessing to have a tiny part in these people’s lives.
Click on the little book to see it on Amazon. You can also view the interior.
On the back cover, it reads: “To a child, a daddy is a wonderful gift.” And that’s so true! I hope you will join me in thanking my sweetheart for this labor of love that 's touched so many lives! God bless.
by Kathleen Blease
A man visited his mother two months before his first child was due. He, his mother, and his wife all expected a lovely healthy baby and were preparing with all the necessary and happy chores. The man’s mother wanted her son to know how excited she was for him, and how proud. So she gave him a little book. He didn’t have time to read it, so he thanked her for it and slipped it into his briefcase. Saying his goodbyes, he left his mother and drove home.
Little did he know that that evening his wife would deliver their baby two months too early, a tiny preemie with a tough time ahead of it. Together, the man and wife held each other as they watched the nurses and doctors care for their little one. The busyness of the hospital staff must have been daunting. They sat and watched, feeling helpless and wondering what the future held. And then the husband remembered the little book, the one he slipped into his briefcase. He went to his car and pulled it out and noticed the title, “I Can’t Wait to Meet My Daddy.” The man and his wife sat and read the words of the unborn child who was dreaming about his life with daddy. The man’s mother wrote to the author and told her the comfort they found in those words.
I have the privilege being that author. However, I have to admit right away that I am not responsible for this little book. It’s my husband. And, together, we receive many stories very much like this one. (I never did learn what happened to the little preemie, but I do hope that with the help of today’s miracle medicine, the little one is toddling about and making Grandma and Mama smile, along with Grandpa and Daddy.)
It all had a very simple beginning.
On Christmas Eve fourteen years ago, my husband and I were expecting our first child. All the gifts were wrapped and put under the tree, but I felt that there was still one to be made, something for my husband from his first-born son. I sat down in my tiny office in the attic and began to doodle ideas. The words, “I can’t wait to meet my daddy” came out, and so did a little book that I bound with a handmade cover. On Christmas day, my husband read the words I suspected our tiny son was thinking, eager to meet daddy, and he was deeply touched. For years after that, my husband insisted that it should be published.
When a few publishers told me that they loved the book but it didn’t suit their needs at the time, my husband took it upon himself to learn how to publish books. Now, if it were up to me, knowing something about what goes into publishing a glossy book (I’m from the publishing field), it would have stayed in the cedar chest. But my husband was driven and insistent, and he made a huge investment in time, talent, and treasure to publish I Can’t Wait to Meet My Daddy. Today, that book has helped thousands of wives and mothers tell new dads just how precious they are, and we receive calls and notes from so many mothers, grandmother, and great-grandmothers who purchased the book as a gift. As you can see, the stories they tell us are touching. And it is an honor and blessing to have a tiny part in these people’s lives.
Click on the little book to see it on Amazon. You can also view the interior.
On the back cover, it reads: “To a child, a daddy is a wonderful gift.” And that’s so true! I hope you will join me in thanking my sweetheart for this labor of love that 's touched so many lives! God bless.
Friday, January 28, 2011
Days of Winter
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Outside...Brrr. Last year, he couldn't do this. If there's a wife happy to see her husband snow blowing, it is I! (Sounds better to say "it is me," no?)   Meemo smells the chicken stock simmering on the stove, and he knows it's not for him. Poor guy. |
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
How Do We Raise Our Children Catholic--So It STICKS?
by Kathleen Blease
I can't tell you how many times I have heard the question, "How do I help my children remain Catholic?" I can't tell you how many times I have heard mothers lament over their children forsaking the church for more worldly lifestyles and pursuits.
As my husband and I are raising our boys Catholic, I also have the same concerns and worries. Will there be a time when my boys decide to break away from what they think is just something that can be called "Mom's interest"? How can we all encourage our children to stay on the straight and narrow path and to realize that our Faith is not just another interest, such as gardening and cooking. Where do we begin?
A convert to the Catholic Church and a professor at the Franciscan University of Stuebenville, Ohio, Drake McCalister, offered some very sound advice. Looking back on my own experience, I can see that he is correct. Click here to watch his interview. His insights as an outsider coming into the Church gives us a special view of the beauty and wisdom of Mother Church.
Professor McCalister says that if parents were to follow the Catholic Liturgical Year, the feast days, and the holy days of obligation, one's family would be brought deeper into the Faith. For example, the Liturgical Year calls us back to the Church during Advent and Lent. If you feel you are getting off track (and we can all sense when we do), Advent and Lent is a time to come back. The Church makes this call to holiness to every ordinary man and woman twice a year, every year, and not just for a day or so; the Advent and Lent seasons are quite lengthy, giving us time to take our journey in meaningful steps. For me, they are often small but very helpful steps. If you are not off track, the two seasons then give you a chance to grow even deeper in the Faith, thus closer to Christ.
When my children were little, I based the Liturgical Year on simply Christmas and Easter, Advent and Lent. Advent was a time for shopping and baking cookies. Lent was a time for fish on Fridays. The Liturgical Year was something of a mystery to me. But something simple changed all that. I brought home a new calendar from our parish. I was thinking that my mother used a parish calendar as a family scheduler, and now that my children were school-age, it was time for me to do the same. And I actually read it! What's this? And what's this? What, the new year begins with Advent? What's a solemnity? How is that differ from a feast day? What are these feasts after Christmas? And the questions created a list.
With a little more research, I learned that beyond the calendar of feast days and such, the Liturgical Year included themes for each Mass. And throughout the year, the readings took us through the Old Testament and showed us how it is indeed Christ-centered. (Another revelation for me!) The year brought forth each and every one of Christ's teachings and the virtues we would gain from them. It is a bountiful schedule, and no wonder. The Liturgical Year is itself a vehicle that is instituted by the Bride of Christ, the Holy Catholic Church.
Is it easy to follow the Liturgical Year? It does take more than just following the calendar and taking a casual note of the feast day. First and foremost, we must embrace the fact that the Liturgical Year is a call to Catholics to shape our daily lives and schedules around our Faith--not the other way around. Also, we need to make our children aware of the value of the Liturgical Year, the value of each feast day, solemnity, season of preparation, and each season of celebration, as well as the daily readings and their themes. With the Internet, a plethora of information about each and every element of the Liturgical Year is at our fingertips. With this aid, we can bring Christ into our homes, into our daily lives.
To get started, you might want to visit the official site of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, where you will find valuable information, including a calendar of the daily readings. If you would like a PDF copy of their Liturgical Calendar for the Year 2011, click here. This guide will provide you with the entire year's readings, themes, feast days, and so on. It might look a little complicated, but don't let it scare you; just enjoy going over the materials and finding your way. You might want to couple this with your parish calendar. If you prefer to follow the readings just one day at a time, you can find them in this blog's right column. You can listen or read. I prefer to listen; it reminds me very much of Mass and feels peaceful!
Even if you can add only a bit of the Liturgical Year to your daily life, it will bring a helpful message to your children--that is, our Catholic faith is our life, not our interest, and we are deeply in love with it for good and happy reason.
God bless.
I can't tell you how many times I have heard the question, "How do I help my children remain Catholic?" I can't tell you how many times I have heard mothers lament over their children forsaking the church for more worldly lifestyles and pursuits.
As my husband and I are raising our boys Catholic, I also have the same concerns and worries. Will there be a time when my boys decide to break away from what they think is just something that can be called "Mom's interest"? How can we all encourage our children to stay on the straight and narrow path and to realize that our Faith is not just another interest, such as gardening and cooking. Where do we begin?
A convert to the Catholic Church and a professor at the Franciscan University of Stuebenville, Ohio, Drake McCalister, offered some very sound advice. Looking back on my own experience, I can see that he is correct. Click here to watch his interview. His insights as an outsider coming into the Church gives us a special view of the beauty and wisdom of Mother Church.
Professor McCalister says that if parents were to follow the Catholic Liturgical Year, the feast days, and the holy days of obligation, one's family would be brought deeper into the Faith. For example, the Liturgical Year calls us back to the Church during Advent and Lent. If you feel you are getting off track (and we can all sense when we do), Advent and Lent is a time to come back. The Church makes this call to holiness to every ordinary man and woman twice a year, every year, and not just for a day or so; the Advent and Lent seasons are quite lengthy, giving us time to take our journey in meaningful steps. For me, they are often small but very helpful steps. If you are not off track, the two seasons then give you a chance to grow even deeper in the Faith, thus closer to Christ.
When my children were little, I based the Liturgical Year on simply Christmas and Easter, Advent and Lent. Advent was a time for shopping and baking cookies. Lent was a time for fish on Fridays. The Liturgical Year was something of a mystery to me. But something simple changed all that. I brought home a new calendar from our parish. I was thinking that my mother used a parish calendar as a family scheduler, and now that my children were school-age, it was time for me to do the same. And I actually read it! What's this? And what's this? What, the new year begins with Advent? What's a solemnity? How is that differ from a feast day? What are these feasts after Christmas? And the questions created a list.
With a little more research, I learned that beyond the calendar of feast days and such, the Liturgical Year included themes for each Mass. And throughout the year, the readings took us through the Old Testament and showed us how it is indeed Christ-centered. (Another revelation for me!) The year brought forth each and every one of Christ's teachings and the virtues we would gain from them. It is a bountiful schedule, and no wonder. The Liturgical Year is itself a vehicle that is instituted by the Bride of Christ, the Holy Catholic Church.
Is it easy to follow the Liturgical Year? It does take more than just following the calendar and taking a casual note of the feast day. First and foremost, we must embrace the fact that the Liturgical Year is a call to Catholics to shape our daily lives and schedules around our Faith--not the other way around. Also, we need to make our children aware of the value of the Liturgical Year, the value of each feast day, solemnity, season of preparation, and each season of celebration, as well as the daily readings and their themes. With the Internet, a plethora of information about each and every element of the Liturgical Year is at our fingertips. With this aid, we can bring Christ into our homes, into our daily lives.
To get started, you might want to visit the official site of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, where you will find valuable information, including a calendar of the daily readings. If you would like a PDF copy of their Liturgical Calendar for the Year 2011, click here. This guide will provide you with the entire year's readings, themes, feast days, and so on. It might look a little complicated, but don't let it scare you; just enjoy going over the materials and finding your way. You might want to couple this with your parish calendar. If you prefer to follow the readings just one day at a time, you can find them in this blog's right column. You can listen or read. I prefer to listen; it reminds me very much of Mass and feels peaceful!
Even if you can add only a bit of the Liturgical Year to your daily life, it will bring a helpful message to your children--that is, our Catholic faith is our life, not our interest, and we are deeply in love with it for good and happy reason.
God bless.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
From the Front Pew: The Shoes of Many, One in Christ
by Kathleen Blease
It only makes sense. Since I am a little claustrophobic, sitting in the front pew is my sure-fire way to enjoy (and get through) the entire Mass. It also gives me an opportunity to see things that most parishioners who sit farther back don't get to see, like the small crucifix that graces the altar so the priest can lay his eyes on Christ's suffering while consecrating the bread and wine.
During the Mass on the Feast of the Holy Family, it occurred to me that there are things I see each and every Sunday, things that only a family can gather into one place in such abundance and variety--Shoes!
After receiving Holy Communion, I returned to my pew as usual, knelt down, and stared at the floor while saying my prayers of petitions and thanksgiving. I couldn't help but notice all the shoes that walked in front of me. Sneakers, dress shoes, boots, geriatric shoes, and cool sports shoes, even Monsignor's black wing tips.
Each and every one of those soles reflected the souls who wore them. Some have a casual attitude, while others are more formal. Some are quite active, while others are perhaps nursing sore feet. Young. Old. Mother and Fathers. Little girls in mary janes and frilly socks. Boys in their soccer shoes hidden under their jean hems. Teenagers in skinny jeans poured into heavy suede uggs. The elderly using canes.
Only a family could bring so much diversity to one place, to one line, to receive One Christ in the Holy Eucharist.
I watched those shoes go by, two by two by two. They padded slowly in line, stopped to receive the Eucharist, then off they marched with purpose back to their pews. Indeed, only a family!
It only makes sense. Since I am a little claustrophobic, sitting in the front pew is my sure-fire way to enjoy (and get through) the entire Mass. It also gives me an opportunity to see things that most parishioners who sit farther back don't get to see, like the small crucifix that graces the altar so the priest can lay his eyes on Christ's suffering while consecrating the bread and wine.
During the Mass on the Feast of the Holy Family, it occurred to me that there are things I see each and every Sunday, things that only a family can gather into one place in such abundance and variety--Shoes!
After receiving Holy Communion, I returned to my pew as usual, knelt down, and stared at the floor while saying my prayers of petitions and thanksgiving. I couldn't help but notice all the shoes that walked in front of me. Sneakers, dress shoes, boots, geriatric shoes, and cool sports shoes, even Monsignor's black wing tips.
Each and every one of those soles reflected the souls who wore them. Some have a casual attitude, while others are more formal. Some are quite active, while others are perhaps nursing sore feet. Young. Old. Mother and Fathers. Little girls in mary janes and frilly socks. Boys in their soccer shoes hidden under their jean hems. Teenagers in skinny jeans poured into heavy suede uggs. The elderly using canes.
Only a family could bring so much diversity to one place, to one line, to receive One Christ in the Holy Eucharist.
I watched those shoes go by, two by two by two. They padded slowly in line, stopped to receive the Eucharist, then off they marched with purpose back to their pews. Indeed, only a family!
Monday, October 11, 2010
A Very, Very Attractive Man
When your spouse becomes ill, it changes your life and your marriage forever. In my new column at CatholicMom.com, here's one way it has changed our lives for the better, if just a little bit.
I hope you enjoy the column. Click here.
God bless!
I hope you enjoy the column. Click here.
God bless!
Friday, September 3, 2010
Problems Are Really God's Opportunities to Show Love
Have you read my article at CatholicMom.com, called Opportunity Outside Our Kitchen Door? Take a look. You never know when Our Heavenly Father is going to knock.
God bless.
God bless.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
We Homeschooled BEFORE We Homeschooled
by Kathleen Blease
One day, the boys and I were watching old family videos. When they were little, I loved grabbing the old VHS camera and taped anything they might have been doing--from munching on graham crackers to finger painting to swimming in the pool. In the video, I could see that our kitchen wall was covered in drawings and paintings, papier mache crafts, and even puppets made out of paper plates.
Every day was an adventure. Story time at ten. A walk at eleven. Classical music during lunch time. Then after nap time, it was an afternoon of arts and crafts. We took trips to the public library every week, without fail, and lugged home a stack of picture story books that kept our imaginations flying. I loved them just as much as the boys did!
When our oldest turned five, it was time to send him to school. It never occurred to us to educate him in any other way. Off he went to Catholic school, and his little brother stayed home. We played mancala, Uno, checkers, and even chess to pass the time. We sorted, counted, added, named colors and created new ones. We dug in the dirt, blended paints, glued, and built with legos and made a contest out of who could make the craziest invention. We even competed over who could build something out of only yellow legos, or just red, or blue, and so on. Or using just onesie, twosies, and foursie legos.
Then our younger boy went to Kindergarten, and our time together was reduced to dinner and story time right before bed. By the time he was in first grade, and still refusing to read--and thus falling far behind his classmates, despite the school's special tutoring--it was obvious we needed to take our children's education into our own hands.
When we first started homeschooling, I had plenty of anxieties about providing our children with a proper education. For the first week, my hand shook as I placed it over my heart and faced our classroom flag and recited the pledge of allegiance. Questions loomed over me: "What am I going to do with them today? Will my lesson plans work? What am I going to do with Mr. I-Won't-Read? Can I adequately teach the boys math and science?"
Little by little, I got to know our boys and their individual needs: Son-number-one needed academic challenges, while our little guy needed to take scholarly baby steps, each one well planned to get him to our goal of developing a love of reading and writing. I planned those steps myself, using only my mother's instincts and lots of prayers.
My baby is now beginning seventh grade, and his brother high school. Both are strong readers and writers. Never did I dream that my anti-book first grader would grow to love H.G. Wells, Jack London, and Mark Twain. Nor did I plan that my oldest would have his own blog and comic book.
Indeed, there is one thing I have to admit that I realized only in retrospect: We've been homeschooling our children from the very beginning--since they were just a few months old and we played on the floor face-to-face. All the fingerpaintings, story time, arts and crafts, weekly trips to the library, and walks about town planted healthy seeds of learning!
If you ever wonder if you can homeschool, ask yourself these simple questions: Do you play with your child? Have you been playing with your child ever since he was a tiny babe? Then you are a homeschooler. No one knows your child like you do. All those hours together have given you a very special insight that no other educator can possess, regardless of how skilled or experienced she is. Your parental instincts and pure intentions are priceless!
Parents are indeed the primary educators of their children. The Church agrees. The Pope agrees. In Deuteronomy, Moses instructs his people to teach their children...when they are at work, when they are rest, when they are at home, when they are away. He doesn't instruct the parents to be sure to find good teachers; he tells them to be the teachers themselves. And he assures them that their efforts will be blessed.
God bless.
One day, the boys and I were watching old family videos. When they were little, I loved grabbing the old VHS camera and taped anything they might have been doing--from munching on graham crackers to finger painting to swimming in the pool. In the video, I could see that our kitchen wall was covered in drawings and paintings, papier mache crafts, and even puppets made out of paper plates.
Every day was an adventure. Story time at ten. A walk at eleven. Classical music during lunch time. Then after nap time, it was an afternoon of arts and crafts. We took trips to the public library every week, without fail, and lugged home a stack of picture story books that kept our imaginations flying. I loved them just as much as the boys did!
When our oldest turned five, it was time to send him to school. It never occurred to us to educate him in any other way. Off he went to Catholic school, and his little brother stayed home. We played mancala, Uno, checkers, and even chess to pass the time. We sorted, counted, added, named colors and created new ones. We dug in the dirt, blended paints, glued, and built with legos and made a contest out of who could make the craziest invention. We even competed over who could build something out of only yellow legos, or just red, or blue, and so on. Or using just onesie, twosies, and foursie legos.
Then our younger boy went to Kindergarten, and our time together was reduced to dinner and story time right before bed. By the time he was in first grade, and still refusing to read--and thus falling far behind his classmates, despite the school's special tutoring--it was obvious we needed to take our children's education into our own hands.
When we first started homeschooling, I had plenty of anxieties about providing our children with a proper education. For the first week, my hand shook as I placed it over my heart and faced our classroom flag and recited the pledge of allegiance. Questions loomed over me: "What am I going to do with them today? Will my lesson plans work? What am I going to do with Mr. I-Won't-Read? Can I adequately teach the boys math and science?"
Little by little, I got to know our boys and their individual needs: Son-number-one needed academic challenges, while our little guy needed to take scholarly baby steps, each one well planned to get him to our goal of developing a love of reading and writing. I planned those steps myself, using only my mother's instincts and lots of prayers.
My baby is now beginning seventh grade, and his brother high school. Both are strong readers and writers. Never did I dream that my anti-book first grader would grow to love H.G. Wells, Jack London, and Mark Twain. Nor did I plan that my oldest would have his own blog and comic book.
Indeed, there is one thing I have to admit that I realized only in retrospect: We've been homeschooling our children from the very beginning--since they were just a few months old and we played on the floor face-to-face. All the fingerpaintings, story time, arts and crafts, weekly trips to the library, and walks about town planted healthy seeds of learning!
If you ever wonder if you can homeschool, ask yourself these simple questions: Do you play with your child? Have you been playing with your child ever since he was a tiny babe? Then you are a homeschooler. No one knows your child like you do. All those hours together have given you a very special insight that no other educator can possess, regardless of how skilled or experienced she is. Your parental instincts and pure intentions are priceless!
Parents are indeed the primary educators of their children. The Church agrees. The Pope agrees. In Deuteronomy, Moses instructs his people to teach their children...when they are at work, when they are rest, when they are at home, when they are away. He doesn't instruct the parents to be sure to find good teachers; he tells them to be the teachers themselves. And he assures them that their efforts will be blessed.
God bless.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
What Was I Supposed To Be?
This little video doesn't need comment. It's so eloquent and complete, put to Ray Boltz's song. Unborn babies who are aborted ask Our Lord in Heaven, "What was I suppose to be?" Thanks to my FB friend, Birgit, for sharing this with me.
God bless.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Finding Her Joy After a Life of Career--Motherhood
I'm delighted to introduce to you a guest blogger, Stephanie Principe. Stephanie is devoted to the pro-life movement. She shares with us how she found her joy in becoming a mom later in life after a long career, and how she discovered the grace that Our Lord has granted her in her new role. Thank you, Stephanie, for sharing!
by Stephanie Principe
For as long as I could remember, I always had a love for babies and children, ever since my mother gave me my first baby doll to play with. I was only a small child, not even five years old, when my mother would catch me rocking my little baby doll and talking to her lovingly. I always seemed to have the desire or calling to be a mother.
The way that my life turned out for me, I received the gift of motherhood later in life. After being married for three years, my husband Jeff and I were wondering if becoming parents would ever happen. I had just turned forty years old. We had recently asked our small prayer group to pray for us. Of course, my husband and I had said many tear filled prayers of our own: "Please Lord make us parents."
After a few more months of our friends praying for us and some counsel from my OB/GYN doctor, I became pregnant. I remember taking an at-home pregnancy test and seeing the postive result. We could hardly believe it. Could I possibly, finally be pregnant? Has God answered my fervent pleas? "Please Lord, make me a mother!! I just want to have a child of my own, I want to know what it is like to carry and give birth to a child."
I made an appointment with my OB/GYN. My husband and I did not want to get our hopes up until we spoke to the doctor. I remember so well to this day what it was like waiting in the examination room at the doctor's office. My doctor walked in, holding in her hand a small piece of paper. She had just preformed an ultrasound exam to determine if I was indeed pregnant. With a big, sunny smile on her face, she handed me the piece of paper and said, "Congratulations, this is your first baby picture!!"
I can hardly put into words the feeling I had at that moment. I looked down at the small slip of paper that revealed the ultrasound of my baby. It was a black and white image. My baby looked like a miniature, abstract dot, like a small seedling, but to me it was the most beautiful image my eyes could ever see. It was as if I was looking at the most beautiful piece of artwork ever created, or the most breathtaking sunset on the beach.
The tiny image hardly looked like a baby, but I couldn't take my eyes off of her. The busy doctor had left the room, and I sat there staring at the tiny ultrasound image of my daughter. "My baby! Oh Lord how could I ever thank you enough!"
After our daughter was born, I would just sit holding her and rocking her--hour after hour. I would just look at her and be in awe with this thought in my heart, "This is my baby. This is the child that you Lord have chosen for me. From all Eternity, you chose her to be my child and I was chosen to be her mother." It was the most wonderful feeling. God created this tiny soul for me to care for. I would be entrusted with her life and soul. To raise her in the Faith. To teach her to love God. To teach and show her what it means to love and be loved. This is what God had appointed me to do.
I always knew that I wanted to be a mother. I always loved children. Unfortunately, growing up and attending a secular university I did not always have the most positive image of motherhood. I had grown to think that having a career came first. I thought that being a wife and a mother was somewhat of a subserviant role, a second class position in life. More or less you "give up " your life to do a lot of the thankless jobs that a man does not want or have the time to do. I used to hear from some of my mother's friends about how they had to sacrifice so much for their children. They all sounded so unhappy about this. It was as if they felt they were cheated in life--as if they ended up with the short end of the stick.
Despite all this, I knew when I married my husband, that I wanted to have a child.
But what I did not realize was how much joy it is to have a child. Carrying my baby was the biggest joy. There is really no greater joy in life. I really did not have true joy in my life like I have now. Is raising a child work? Is there a level of sacrifice? I like to call it self giving. Yes, you have to give of yourself. With being a mother there is an opening of your heart. It is in this, through prayer, God gives you His grace.
God tugs on your heart and you open your heart. This opening of the heart makes you want to give of yourself. You give of yourself to your child and to your husband out of love. As you give, as your heart opens, God in exchange fills it with His joy--His joy, His peace that you have never felt before, because you are loving your child. You are caring for your child and your husband, so you are living according to what God's will. You are doing what you were created to do. To be a mom!!
Then you have the most awesome realization that God--the God who designed the whole world, the same God who spoke the world into existence--has chosen you!! He has chosen you to be a mother of your child from before the world was made, from all eternity, from before the beginning of time.
I now know that being self-centered and living just for myself and being selfish--which is what the world tells us to do--can never make me happy. That can never bring me the same joy I now have, the precious, sweet, wonderful joy of being someone's mom.
You can connect with Stephanie Principe on Facebook, and join her in the joyful message of the pro-life movement. If you would like to read more about the pro-life movement, you can get started at Voices for Life.
For as long as I could remember, I always had a love for babies and children, ever since my mother gave me my first baby doll to play with. I was only a small child, not even five years old, when my mother would catch me rocking my little baby doll and talking to her lovingly. I always seemed to have the desire or calling to be a mother.
The way that my life turned out for me, I received the gift of motherhood later in life. After being married for three years, my husband Jeff and I were wondering if becoming parents would ever happen. I had just turned forty years old. We had recently asked our small prayer group to pray for us. Of course, my husband and I had said many tear filled prayers of our own: "Please Lord make us parents."
After a few more months of our friends praying for us and some counsel from my OB/GYN doctor, I became pregnant. I remember taking an at-home pregnancy test and seeing the postive result. We could hardly believe it. Could I possibly, finally be pregnant? Has God answered my fervent pleas? "Please Lord, make me a mother!! I just want to have a child of my own, I want to know what it is like to carry and give birth to a child."
I made an appointment with my OB/GYN. My husband and I did not want to get our hopes up until we spoke to the doctor. I remember so well to this day what it was like waiting in the examination room at the doctor's office. My doctor walked in, holding in her hand a small piece of paper. She had just preformed an ultrasound exam to determine if I was indeed pregnant. With a big, sunny smile on her face, she handed me the piece of paper and said, "Congratulations, this is your first baby picture!!"
I can hardly put into words the feeling I had at that moment. I looked down at the small slip of paper that revealed the ultrasound of my baby. It was a black and white image. My baby looked like a miniature, abstract dot, like a small seedling, but to me it was the most beautiful image my eyes could ever see. It was as if I was looking at the most beautiful piece of artwork ever created, or the most breathtaking sunset on the beach.
The tiny image hardly looked like a baby, but I couldn't take my eyes off of her. The busy doctor had left the room, and I sat there staring at the tiny ultrasound image of my daughter. "My baby! Oh Lord how could I ever thank you enough!"
After our daughter was born, I would just sit holding her and rocking her--hour after hour. I would just look at her and be in awe with this thought in my heart, "This is my baby. This is the child that you Lord have chosen for me. From all Eternity, you chose her to be my child and I was chosen to be her mother." It was the most wonderful feeling. God created this tiny soul for me to care for. I would be entrusted with her life and soul. To raise her in the Faith. To teach her to love God. To teach and show her what it means to love and be loved. This is what God had appointed me to do.
I always knew that I wanted to be a mother. I always loved children. Unfortunately, growing up and attending a secular university I did not always have the most positive image of motherhood. I had grown to think that having a career came first. I thought that being a wife and a mother was somewhat of a subserviant role, a second class position in life. More or less you "give up " your life to do a lot of the thankless jobs that a man does not want or have the time to do. I used to hear from some of my mother's friends about how they had to sacrifice so much for their children. They all sounded so unhappy about this. It was as if they felt they were cheated in life--as if they ended up with the short end of the stick.
Despite all this, I knew when I married my husband, that I wanted to have a child.
But what I did not realize was how much joy it is to have a child. Carrying my baby was the biggest joy. There is really no greater joy in life. I really did not have true joy in my life like I have now. Is raising a child work? Is there a level of sacrifice? I like to call it self giving. Yes, you have to give of yourself. With being a mother there is an opening of your heart. It is in this, through prayer, God gives you His grace.
God tugs on your heart and you open your heart. This opening of the heart makes you want to give of yourself. You give of yourself to your child and to your husband out of love. As you give, as your heart opens, God in exchange fills it with His joy--His joy, His peace that you have never felt before, because you are loving your child. You are caring for your child and your husband, so you are living according to what God's will. You are doing what you were created to do. To be a mom!! I now know that being self-centered and living just for myself and being selfish--which is what the world tells us to do--can never make me happy. That can never bring me the same joy I now have, the precious, sweet, wonderful joy of being someone's mom.
You can connect with Stephanie Principe on Facebook, and join her in the joyful message of the pro-life movement. If you would like to read more about the pro-life movement, you can get started at Voices for Life.Monday, July 19, 2010
Lila Rose and The Mona Lisa Project: A Must-See for Every Catholic
The is a must-see for every Catholic.
Lila Rose, an elegant and determined young woman (and a homeschool graduate) has dedicated her life to fighting abortion. Her speech is elegant and direct. Especially poignant is her story of the unborn cousins.
Here's also the story of the Mona Lisa Project and how this little grassroots group is fighting the Goliath Planned Parenthood with truth and love for the unborn.
The undercover video Lila mentions follows. (If you don't see it below, please click here.)
God bless.
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